Hello

Hello readers!

Its been like forever since I posted anything here.

I got so busy for the past months with NYSC ( national youth service corps) that I hardly had time for myself, talk more of sitting down to write. I promise that I will be more consistent from now onward.

I am sure for my none Nigerian audience are wondering what is NYSC. NYSC is a one year compulsory service to the nation for every graduate of the tertiary institutions whether in Nigeria or out of the country.

You must be a Nigeria citizen to be able to do this ,even if you finished from a Nigerian tertiary institution. And like I said it is compulsory. Well if you want to work in Nigeria.

Mine has really been challenging because my place of primary assignment is in another state. This because I was deployed to a state that is two hours by public transport and forty-five minutes with private transportation away from the state I stay in.

I felt it was just waste of resources to move two hours away from home to rent a new place and get other things that come with moving. So as a result I have been spending four hours everyday four days of the week on the road and have not had time to post but luckily, school are on holidays and I will soon be rounding up too!

Therefore watch out for more posts from me and my co-writers on this blog.😘😘😘✌🏾✌🏾

BEING THERE

Any sort of trial in life has a mental and psychological aspect. Be it financial issues, marriage issues, accidents, problems with school, problems with others, life crises, and whatever else you can think of; it has the power to change how we think, behave, and relate to others. As friends to loved ones, we need to understand the importance of knowing how to support those in need. They can go through very difficult trials, some which re-define the bonds we share. It is through these times that we need to be most vigilant and aware about what we are doing for they can seriously affect those we care about.

Being there means making the time to visit and sit and talk to the loved one. Phone calls and texts are great, but they cannot and should not replace one on one talk time with the individual. Whether it is helping the depressed friend clean the house, treating them to a night out, looking through old photos together, or just a walk; it is all a part of communicating to them your presence. Actions indeed do speak louder than words. You are letting them know they can count on and this gives them a sort of strength and feelings of being valued which are powerful emotions for a person going through a difficult phase.

When listening, listen without judgment. Be able to see and feel as they feel from their perspectives without putting labels such as “you’re weak,” or “that was a stupid thing to do,” or “you could’ve avoided that.” Chances are they are repeating the same self-doubting phrases in their head over and over again and the last thing they need is to hear it from someone else. Even if these are your first reactions, try to be objective and focus on helping them alleviate the negativity.

Lastly, remember, your job is to be a friend. Not a teacher, not a judge, not a police officer, and in some cases, not a bank. Your job is to be the shoulder to lean on. And it seems too simple, almost unimportant. But it is critical for helping them mentally and boosting their self esteem. Your presence and non-judgment allows your loved one to express themselves freely and feel valued. These are very crucial steps in their journey to figuring it out. And you can be the one that helps them begin.

Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend.
Albert Camus

By Engaisi Peter.

 

Mental health is a state of well-being in which every individual realises his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community. Mental health shows the level of psychological and emotional well-being. Our […]

via What You Should Know About Mental Health – Psychology — rekhasahay

Four useful and captivating talks.

via Best TED talks on psychology — Thinking Clearly

Characteristics of social behavior Social psychology is studying a wide range of complex social behavior regarding, e.g., aggression, attitudes, attribution, gender roles, group processes, health and helping behavior, intergroup relations, leadership and motivation, personality, relationships, and social influences (Richard, Bond, and Stokes-Zoota, 2003), just to name a few. It is key that “Humans are a […]

via Evaluation of social psychology as a science — mathias sager

CONDEMNATION? NO, HELP? YES!

Our society has grown to that level where when our human minds can’t understand certain things, we automatically term them evil.

Yes I know, after the second sentence you were like  ”now what is this?”  but please bear with me.

Today on the psych rant, I will talk about what many people in the African settings consider as a curse or some evil of sort and many in the Western world are yet to understand. It is none other than MANIC DEPRESSION which is known by many as bipolar disorder.

It is a condition that goes with a series of mood swings, ranging from depressive lows to manic highs (note I said DEPRESSIVE LOWS and MANIC HIGH). So, don’t go referring to your friend’s five minutes’ madness as bipolar disorder.  Chronic ones could go for years or a life; and thanks to the rise in individualistic society, the disorder is on the rise.

Some of the episodes vary, lasting for days or even weeks on each occurrence. These may happen several times in a year or even throughout the year.

Some of the mania symptoms include; high energy level with reduced need for sleep, risky behavior, anger, anxiety, hopelessness, crying, delusion, lack of concentration, depression, paranoia, fatigue, impulsivity, weight gain or weight loss, self-harm. In some cases, the victim might experience psychosis.

Sadly, this disorder has no cure, but the good news is that it can be curtailed. There are series of medication that can be prescribed that will reduce the risk of this. Apart from medication, there is therapy. The use of support groups which consists of counseling and sharing of experiences with other people who have similar problems.

Other treatments are such as cognitive behavioral therapy, psychoeducation, family therapy and hospitalization. And this is where I am laying emphasis because this is where the family and society at large has failed these group of people.

In the African background where I am from many family members see these people as possessed by some evil spirit or something.  The victims have been through hell in the hands of spiritualists.

There have been cases of brutality leading to death by traditionalists or even poisoned to death with some strange concussion. There have even been incidents where some were killed in cold blood as a recommendation by some witch doctor. Many say this must be done to remove the curse from the community and different other myths. Please, my Africans let us stop mixing up none spiritual matters with spiritual ones.

Another issue is many of us are so busy trying to make that six-figure salary that we don’t pay attention to some of these matters around us. Manic depression could be little in an individual but as result lack of treatment from an early stage, this can develop into bigger problems, and this is when relatives begin to take these affected individuals on some healing marathons.

Well, my advice today is for us to care enough to be vigilant about these issues. No amount of good is too small or too big.  Say hi to that lonely or strange kid that is always on his or her own. And to that neighbor that no one seems to know about on your street, invite him for the next birthday party, barbecue or whatsoever that you people are having and they can partake in; and please stop staring at them when they pass as if they have poop or some plague on them.

Do not stigmatize them by making them the subject of ridicule at your dinner table. Help them! And if you can’t do that, please don’t judge them. Their lives are as valuable as yours.